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Secret Life -- Ben Declares His Love For Amy

by anonymous

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It was the show's 99th episode and everyone was in the mood for celebrating Ricky and Amy's wedding. Only it turns out they didn't really get married. I had a feeling they didn't get married, especially when they didn't show them getting married. Not even this show is dumb enough not to show a big moment like their lead character finally getting married to the father of her child.

Anyway, Amy arrives at school and the first thing she gets wheeled at her is this huge wedding cake, courtesy of Dylan. No doubt Dylan is relieved that Amy is married to Ricky and no longer a threat to her relationship with Ben. Next the whole school does some Glee-like number with Madison and Lauren dressed up in sparkly blue dresses looking like the Supremes as they serenade her while the back-up dancers are holding Ricky's face on a stick in front of their faces. Actually, Fred Astaire did the same with Ginger's Rogers masks in the closing dance number of Shall We Dance.

On a side note, for some reason Madison dyed her pretty red hair blonde and now she looks all washed out. I never understand it when someone with pretty red hair dyes it blonde and makes themselves look all washed out. Lindsay Lohan did it and so did Laura Prepon when she was on The 70's Show. I keep wishing they'd get a clue and dye it back to the red color that looked better on them.

Ben's well wishes to Amy on her marriage to Ricky are ungraceful at best. And he gets more and more ungraceful with each new person he encounters. Like the school counselor who wants him to mentor a student and he tells her point blank he won't do it. Considering he could be up on an arson charge, it doesn't really make him the best mentor material. Then he runs into Omar, who is going to teach at the school, and accuses him of being a pervert who likes little girls, since he was dating Adrian. Omar takes offense and wants to call the police on Ben. Finally, Ben encounters Amy and it all comes spilling out. He tells her he loves her and that he always has.

This comes as no surprise, since it was pretty obvious by the crappy way he treated Adrian after she lost the baby. He couldn't get free of her fast enough, so he could be free in case he had a chance with Amy. Not that he has one. It's not like it's a big secret or anything. It may explain the whole Dylan thing and why he convinced himself he was in love with her. He was transferring his feelings for Amy on to her since he knows he can't have who he really wants.

Unfortunately for Ben, he says that within the earshot of Dylan's friends, who are quick to tell her what he said, which could be very bad news for Ben. She pretty much warned Ben that if he wasn't with her, her father wouldn't protect him from getting in trouble for the school fire. They also tell Dylan he's a lose cannon because of what he accused Omar of. Both those are prime reasons for her to throw Ben to the wolves and let him take the blame for what happened.

Adrian and Ricky have an unpleasant encounter at college. I hate the way Ricky always acts so smug around Adrian. But you could say Adrian more than had the last laugh on him. When Adrian learns that Ricky is majoring in business, she tells him not to have any plans of moving up in Leo's company, since Ben will never allow it. Earlier, Leo had offered Ricky just such an opportunity stating Ben wanted nothing to do with the business. Adrian agrees that Ben doesn't care about the business, but she tells Ricky that Ben hates him for taking from him what he wants: Amy. So he'll make sure Ricky never has a career in Leo's company, even though Ricky would be good at it.

Adrian comes home to find Omar about to have dinner with her parents. Apparently, Omar is still interested in Adrian. Adrian tells him she doesn't want to date while she's in college. Something tells me that won't last very long. Meanwhile Ben tells Leo that he hates Ricky for stealing the life that should have been his.

Another uncomfortable dinner is at Kathleen's. Sanctimonious hypocrite Grace is cloaking herself in religion to a disgusting degree. It's great if you really believe in God, but what she's doing is pretty disgusting. She doesn't like George and Kathleen kissing at the dinner table so aims her self-righteous prayer at them, but they ignore her. Tom usually annoys that crap out of me, but I enjoyed him giving her a hard time. In other news, Jacob has returned home to Africa. Maybe he had enough of his lunatic American family. How anyone could put up with them for a long stretch is beyond me. Jacob was actually to nice of a character to be on this show. He just didn't have that ickiness they all seem to have.

For some reason Jack's coach wants him to turn back to religion. I wasn't really paying much attention. After learning this tool was dating someone he knew was just using him for information I really have no interest or empathy for him, any longer. Anyway, he calls up sanctimonious hypocrite Grace to lead Jack back to The Word.

Ashley is in for an unpleasant surprise when Toby tells her he doesn't want to go to Italy with her. He asks her why she's always running away. Maybe because the less she's on the show the better? Sorry, but she's actually the most annoying character on this show. She seems to have no natural affection for any member of her family. At least the others show affection to their families on occasion. Anyway, after Ashley leaves the room Toby tells Nora he's going to have to go home and try to convince his parents to let him to go off to Italy with her.

Ann went to visit her mother, who I'm guessing has Alzheimer's. She apologized to her for not inviting her to her wedding and running off to get married and told her she was gay. Her mother didn't even know who she was, unfortunately, so the conversation went pretty well.

Finally, Amy and Ricky look at their wedding video. It's entitled Amy and Dicky's Wedding. The title says it all. The guy conducting the service was a major nut-job. You could really understand why they didn't go through with getting married. What's harder to explain in the continued deception to everyone that they actually did get married. Margaret even gave Ricky her parents wedding rings to use for him and Amy. I can understand not wanting to admit the truth after all the nice things George said, but for some reason I get the feeling they always intended to lie about it. It's the kind of icky behavior people on this show exhibit. Like wanting your ex-wife to be gay so you can start up with your first ex-wife and not feel guilty.


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