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How Children Behavior Management Is Influenced By Parents

by laurafobler

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Maintaining children behavior management will usually be difficult since it seems a child's behavior varies on a day-to-day basis or even in the blink of an eye. Where I and many other parents make the mistake is that normally a child's behavior has not changed at all from day to day. In fact it is usually the condition currently impacting the parent which aids to drastically modify the way they see the actions of children. One parental error that has been brought to light by the insight of parent-child communication expert Laura Fobler can be seen with the effect of parental opinion.

On some days I considered my kids behavior management as successful as I loved the company of my kids and we had a fun day. We would laugh most the day, enjoying a wide number of activities that entertained all of us. From my perspective my children were behaving splendidly as they got along with each other and usually responded positively to any instructions I offered. On these days I was usually in a good mood, with positive feelings and a well-rested body. Fobler would note that my positive outlook helped me to look positively at my children and the actions they took.

On other days I viewed my children behavior management as a failure as I struggled to deal with my kids and had to dole out many punishments for behavior I viewed as poor. On these days I was usually disappointed with the performance of my kids and they are disappointed with my own behavior. From my perspective my kids were acting badly when in reality they were acting no unique from any other day and it was my situation which was varying views. On these days I may have had difficulty at work, felt under the weather or even did not sleep well the night before. Fobler would note that my negative outlook assisted to contribute to the perspective I had of kids misbehaving.

And that is completely OK! After all, we parents are humans, not robots. Conveying your humanness is one of the greatest gifts you can give your kids!

Though, a lot of parents might think that being consistent will lead to the required solution. I'm scared nothing is further from the fact. In fact, being consistent is simply impossible, as I have proven by the description above. There is no hesitation that my requirements as a human being modify from day to day. If I need to be consistent, I will also have to be untruthful since I ought to neglect my own emotions and behave according to the steady rules, instead of act according to my true feelings and requirements.

A lot of parents think that behaving inconsistently will lead to confusion. Fortunately, this is not true at all. If you express your true feelings and requirements regardless the circumstances, children shall learn that you are a human being with emotions and needs and this elicits sympathy and a caring overall attitude towards other people.

On the other hand, if you choose to stick to the rules no matter what, children will find out what your rules are, but if they will behave accordingly? If you want to be a police officer all the time, I guess this might be a great choice.

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