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I should have been a woman.

by anonymous

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I am now faced with the gruesome task of finding a mate. I'm not looking to start a family yet, but for the sake of argument, let's pretend I am. The problem I see with "today's" girls is that their IQ dropped significantly in the past 10 years. Most women I meet are incapable of logical or rational thought, most of their actions are either based on what the rest of the herd does or on "female intuition".

Some might say that I have high standards, but how can one know I have high standards unless they compare them with other standards and who am I not to say that you or anyone else has low standards? Do you see where I'm getting at? I don't care about your standards.

I'm not going to plow the first bimbo I meet just because she has a nice rack, she has to be intelligent, attractive (not looking for miss world 2012 but I wouldn't want a 200 pound overgrown gorilla either), funny, semi-nerdy (I don't need her to know how to set up a cluster but she should know at least why the wi-fi isn't working and how to fix it), a good sense of shape and color (having this allows one to interpret art, dress well and decorate a home), be able to play more than solitaire and enjoy movies.

Many of the women I meet are either too much in to fashion that they can't see past their hollow shell, too interested in how much I make rather than how much I can offer, need another bimbo to complete the Barby and Ken doll set, stupid or don't speak any of the languages I speak, making conversation awkward and less fruitful than it should be. Women, I am dissapoint(ed).

At first I said, well, if I can't find what I'm looking for in the female population then I'll turn to the male population and just become gay. A friend told me that I am too much of a man to find another man and that all the gay men I would meet would behave as women anyway and that wouldn't solve my problem, she had a point. "You should have been a woman", she was right again.

I then started exploring this possibility. Being a woman means that picking a partner is easier, as a woman I would have men lined up at the door waiting to stick it to me (HA! the power!), I could just write a quiz with 100 questions, pick the highest scoring quiz and that's it, I found someone to start a family with. Women have it easy...

Having poured out all of this discomfort has not changed the way I feel but at least I hope I managed to raise an eyeborw or two.




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